As good as it feels to reach a goal that we have set up for us, it can be very disturbing when we see goals that we have not yet reached. When we realize that we are not reaching the goal on time (or at all), the enthusiasm and inspiration slowly disappear, leaving us wondering if we are good enough to stick to our personal goals. Be assured that we are good enough, but our methods are not. And we need to take a hard look at what we are doing, we need to truthfully listen to our excuses and thoughts.
Which excuses or thoughts? I have spoken before about self-sabotage and of negative thoughts which are both real enemies we face every day. We need to learn to let go of negative behaviour and thoughts that make us feel as if we are cheating ourselves, even though we are working so hard and keeping up with new positive attitudes and habits. Yes, we have made immense progress and that you need to recognize and be happy for it.
In my experience the best activity that works for me is to journal about my day and my thoughts. Journaling is my way to stay accountable. When I stop journaling I know deep inside I am running away from a reality I don’t want to face. It can be that I stop working out, or that I am overeating, or that I am not keeping up with the house chores. Whenever I stray away from my goals, I stop journaling. And to be honest, finding my way back can be hard especially if I am feeling overwhelmed with the day to day activities.
I can convince myself that I am working hard, that the kids need me, that my husband needs me, that I need to put more time to my house chores, or that I need a break from the never-ending agenda in order to breath and relax, but at the end I know that it is just a way of coping with the neglected goals that I can’t reach (like writing a blog post every week or sticking to the 10k running training).
Taking time to reflect on why we stray from our goals, why we look the other way instead of facing the fact that the S.M.A.R.T. goal that we have (for the day, week, month, or year) has not been reached is a part of growing up, of facing reality, of maturing, and of self-improvement. It takes guts to look back, backtrack, and start again, but oh boy! It does feel encouraging at the same time.
So do not despair if that goal is looking harder and harder to reach. Take a look at your reality, at your day, at your hours, write in your journal about your true feelings, meditate in silence and listen to your mind speak to you, take it in, understand it, give it a pad in the back, and start mapping your way back to it. We can do it. We do have the power to do it.